2011 Lions Preview

To say expectations about the Detroit Lions haven’t been this high since Barry was still playing is like saying that Brian Kelly has anger management issues. It would be akin to suggesting to Sammi and Ron-Ron that maybe they would be better off seeing other people. Hell, Peter King of SI/NBC called them a Super Bowl contender. I know, right? While he has since back tracked faster than Nnamdi Asomogha, he still has them making the playoffs. That is still optimistic, but realistic at least. I think that his 10-6 prediction is “best case scenario”, and would be happy with 8-8. This optimism is all based upon Matthew Stafford playing all 16 regular season games, and therein lies the rub. You guarantee a health Stafford, and I am on board with 10 or 11 wins. I just have yet to see anything that makes me believe he can stay healthy. His injuries have been of the freak variety, but they cost him games nonetheless.

For this preview, I will group all the position groups together, before taking a broader view.

QUARTERBACK

This, as I alluded to earlier, should be the difference between playoffs, and draft lottery. Matthew Stafford has killed it this preseason, putting up a 25/33 for 395 yards with 5TD and 0 picks. I know, I know, preseason. But dude showed what he can do. He did that against mostly first team defenses, and with the shortened training camp, they had their foot on the pedal. The biggest stat to look at is that he was only sacked once. Backus and crew have to make this their priority, and it looks like they finally “get it” for once.

So what does that mean for the regular season? Beats me. And anyone who tells you they know what will happen is a flat out, poopy-faced liar. Yeah I said it. I hate to be Debbie Downer, but I doubt he starts all 16 games this year.  He has yet to do it, and until I’m proven wrong, I will be cautious.

So I guess it’s all gloom and doom again, right? Not so fast my friend. There is actually a capable backup. His name is Shaun Hill, and he performed well last year in relief. 2686 yards with a 16/13 ratio isn’t too bad considering the run game was essentially nonexistent by the time he took over. Jahvid Best was playing on 8 toes, and he was the highlight. He isn’t Peyton Manning by any means, but he also isn’t Peyton Manning’s neck. He’s a guy that will win you a game or two that you shouldn’t have won. He can also cost you a few in the same vein. He should fill-in admirably should Stafford need a few weeks off.

Drew Stanton is still on the roster. He played well enough for me to not hate his guts (as much) at the end of the year. And I know I keep harping on this, but the Lions benched him in favor of Hill last year, despite the miniscule fact that SHAUN HILL HAD A BROKEN ARM. I thought Zac Robinson should have won the job, but I digress. If it comes down to Stanton, chances are Mayhew is looking for a QB early in the 2012 draft.

This position will be the only copout.

HEALTHY STAFFORD GRADE-B

HURTY STAFFORD GRADE- C

RUNNING BACK

Jahvid Best started out like gangbusters last year. He ended up like Ghostbusters. Ghostbusters 3. He suffered from the dreaded turf toe for about the last 2/3 of the season, and lost his explosiveness. Unfortunately, Maurice Morris, Kevin Smith, Aaron Berry, and company couldn’t pick up the slack. The team addressed the depth issue by drafting Mikel Leshoure in the 2^nd round. Leshoure promptly tore his Achilles, and put the team back to square one.

Best and Morris are back, and that’s about it. A healthy Best is an offensive weapon both running the ball, and catching it out of the backfield. But he is not a 25 carry a game guy, and neither is Morris. The team brought in 2 new players to help out in Jerome Harrison from Cleveland, and Keiland Williams from Washington.

They are good depth players, but not the type of guy that will lead you deep into the playoffs. Although, I think Williams is a sleeper.

Had Leshoure been here, I would be happy but not ecstatic about the position. As it stands?

RUNNING BACK GRADE- B-

WIDE RECEIVER

Calvin Johnson is Calvin Johnson.

Nate Burleson had what could be a breakout preseason both production wise and, more importantly, chemistry wise. He and Stafford looked to be N’Sync, and said “Bye, Bye, Bye” to the questions about his inability to keep teams from double covering CJ. He had 55 catches and 6 scores last year, but I could do that opposite Calvin Johnson, and I’m out of shape and a smoker. It’s a good bet that the team will get better production out of the position this year.

And just to be sure, the Lions hedged their bets by drafting Titus Young in the second round of the draft. Young is a prototypical slot WR who should be most effective on short to intermediate crossing routes where he can use his speed to separate from linebackers.

Other players at the position are Rashied Davis, a special teamer from Chicago. Maurice Stovall, a 6’5’’ 220 pounder they picked up off the scrap heap, and looked impressive. Stefan Logan is the main return guy, who I will cover in the Special Teams section.

Anytime you have CJ, a player like Burleson in his second year with the team, and a speedy second round rookie, you are incapable of anything less than a B+ in my book

WIDE RECIEVER GRADE- A-

TIGHT END

Brandon Pettigrew is emerging as one of the best young tight ends in the game. He had 71 catches and 4 TD last year while recovering from a torn ACL. He should be a great ¾ option in the passing game.

Tony Scheffler is the backup, and had 45 catches last year. That is impressive. He could start on a large number of teams, but will still get plenty of time in 2 TE sets when the team tries to establish the run.

Will Heller is an H-back who will play FB when the situation arises. Meh.

TIGHT END GRADE- B

OFFENSIVE LINE

Lest I be considered an imbiber of the Kool-Aid, it gets worse. The skill positions are legit. If this was NFL Blitz, I would pick them over almost everyone. But, in the real world, blocking is important. And blocking is far from this team’s strength.

Contrary to popular opinion, Jeff Backus did not create cancer. He did not fund any terrorist attacks. He did not have sex with your sister. (Ok, I’m 99.9% sure on the first two, and about 50-50 on the third. Dude’s a millionaire.) He is not Jake Long or Joe Thomas, but he isn’t (insert a Raiders or Bills OT here). He’s a serviceable piece that will need replacing soon.

Rob Sims is aboverage (above average) at LG, and is the strongest piece they have. He can be a Pro Bowler if the team succeeds.

Dominic Raiola talks too much, but is still a starter-level player.

Stephen Peterman/Jacques McClendon/Dylan Gandy is the weakest link on the line. The upside is McClendon, but hopes aren’t high.

Gosder Cherilius just got called for a penalty, and he isn’t playing. He is a first rounder that hasn’t developed. He still has time, but not much.

What else can I say? They are the weakest position group on the defense by a large margin. Whether it’s a reflection on the patchwork offense of last year is yet to be seen.  The line gets a horrible rep, but actually isn’t as bad as most think. It gets dinged for not keeping Stafford healthy, however.

OFFENSIVE LINE GRADE- D

OFFENSE

Like I said, this can vary depending on Stafford’s shoulder. If the deep threats at WR and TE can keep teams from loading the box, Best can have a big year. It would also keep blitzers from having free shots, since they will be in coverage. It will also allow someone other than CJ to have the honor of being double teamed on a play-by-play basis.

I will again hedge my bets, and say Stafford misses 3-4 games in the middle of the year, and Hill fills in adequately.

OVERALL OFFENSIVE GRADE- B-

In years past, coming to the defensive side of the ball is when I would start taking shots of paint thinner until I could convince myself that Jordon Dizon and Paris Lenon were legit NFL linebackers. This year I am just going to refresh my cocktail and try to stay realistic. OK, maybe 1 or 2 shots for having remembered Dizon was once a starter.

DEFENSIVE LINE

The obvious strength of the defense, this D-line is one of, if not THE, best in the NFL. The Suh-Nami was defensive rookie of the year, and could be better this year with a healthy KVB. He gets labeled dirty, but I say he just plays hard. Yes, I named numerous fantasy teams the “Suh-Namis” this year, wanna fight about it?

The other DTs are pretty badass as well. Corey Williams more than held his own, and Sammie Lee Hill and Andre Fluellen are quality rotation guys. And they drafted the most dominating collegiate defensive player since, uh, Suh, in Nick Fairley. He has been injured, but when healthy he should clean up next to the House of Spears.

The Des should also reap the benefits of Suh, but it is dependent on Kyle Vanden Bosch’s health. He can be a playmaker when he isn’t double teamed, and the tackles should ensure that he isn’t. He’s getting older, but is far from done. (Fingers crossed)

Cliff Avril had 8.5 sacks last year, and should be able to improve on that with better linebacker and DB play. He has really emerged as a pass rusher, and should hit double-digit sacks this year.

Lawrence Jackson was a steal after he was waived by Seattle, and Willie Young adds depth.

DEFENSIVE LINE GRADE- A

LINEBACKER

This is the most revamped unit on the team, and with that comes a Hallelujah. Julian Peterson was a bust in his time here. He put up good stats, but was constantly out of position, and had some bad penalties. He is no longer here.

The holdovers from last year are DeAndre Levy, who looked like the player he was drafted to be. He was out of position playing MLB last year, and luckily will no longer be there. He will move to the weak side, and can hopefully put some pressure on the QB.

Bobby Carpenter, Ashlee Palmer, and Isaiah Ekejiuba (yes, I had to look it up….thrice), are also back, and should be special teamers/depth guys who won’t kill you. I like Bobby Carpenter, and seeing as he’s a former Buckeye, that is high praise.

Now here’s where most of my personal optimism comes. The Lions signed two starting linebackers. One is Justin Durant, formerly of the Jaguars. He will start on the strong-side, and will be solid. That is nice to say.

But Mr. Stephen Tulluch could be special. He, well, just read what I said when they signed him. I won’t throw out the S word, but Spielman is the potential.

This is the most improved unit on the field and, assuming the gel sometime before November, could be a real strength when the weather gets cold, and teams want to run the ball. Homer grade coming in 3….2….

LINEBACKER GRADE- B

DEFENSIVE BACKS

It starts with Louis Delmas, not only because he led the team in tackles, but he rocks gold teeth, and mostly because he has a pet alligator. He can be a ballhawk when not chasing down receivers that are roaming free 30 yards downfield.

Amari Spievey is a converted corner who will start at strong safety. He should again fit the solid criteria.

The backups at safety are Erik Coleman, Randy Phillips, and special teamer extraordinaire John Wendling. Coleman is pretty good, Phillips is young, and Wendling is a special teamer extraordinaire.

The much-maligned cornerbacks got upgraded as well. Chris Houston probably isn’t a true #1 corner, but he is here. He had one pick, and spent too much time tackling guys after 12 yard gains.

The new starter is Eric Wright, a FA signed from Cleveland. He was a beast two years ago, struggled last year, and is a high-upside question mark this year. He should be somewhere in between, shading towards good. He should be better in this defensive scheme.

Alphonso “Do the Carlton” Smith led last year with 5 picks, but got burned so bad in the New England game, he needed skin grafts.  He was pressed into starting last year, and should man the nickel spot this year.

The rest….uh oh. Aaron Berry should be OK. The rest are guys I doubt you have seen play. Let’s hope it stays that way, if you catch my drift.

This is a below average unit that will be helped by a great D-Line, improved linebackers, and an Offense that may make teams press. If I’m wrong about any of the aforementioned units, expect what you’ve seen the last few years.

DEFENSIVE BACKS GRADE- C-

SPECIAL TEAMS

Jason Hanson is back for the umpteenth time, and will be accurate. He’s Jason Hanson.

Longtime punter Nick Harris lost the job to undrafted rookie Ryan Donahue from Iowa. Harris was decent, so I expect the same or slightly better from Donahue.

The new kickoff rules hurt Detroit more than 75% of the teams, since Stefan Logan is one of the best in the league at returning kicks. Expect to see him taking a knee in the end zone more times than not. However, he also returns punts. He averaged 12.1 yards a return last year.

Let’s just hope this unit never becomes front page news. They should be around middle of the pack, which is fine. Or whatever, it’s special teams.

SPECIAL TEAMS GRADE- C

DEFENSE/SPECAL TEAMS

This is where it gets tough. It comes down to “Do you buy the hype” or “I have seen Lucy pull the ball away right before I kick it, so I am tempering my expectations. Yes, in fact I am Charlie Brown. No, I never understood what my teacher was saying.” The age old question of head –vs- heart. Or in this case, head –vs- liver. I am begrudgingly going with my heart. I always hear about the NFL’s parity, and how it’s cyclical in nature, and herpity derpity derp.

The truth is, this is the most talent assembled on this side of the ball in ages. And, I can’t bring myself to go in halfway. I have to trust in The Schwartz, and hope Suh isn’t negated by suspensions or chop blocks from butthurt offensive linemen.

OVERALL DEFENSIVE/SPECIAL TEAMS GRADE- B

INTANGIBLES

These Lions have a chip on their shoulder. At least they better. They have been the butt of jokes on The Simpsons, The Tonight Show, and countless ESPN studio shows for years now. They will continue to be a laughing-stock until they prove themselves otherwise. The roster only has 10 players that was here when they went 0-16, so let’s hope the new guys can get some redemption for Hanson and the others.

CRAZY PREDICTIONS

Here’s where the fun starts. Here’s where I throw shit at the wall and sees what sticks.

• ·         The Lions have 4 Pro Bowl starters. Calvin, Sims, Suh, and Tulluch. Avril makes it as an alternate, despite deserving to start.
• ·         CJ has a career year, and passes Andre Johnson as the undisputed best WR in the NFL.
• ·         Tulluch leads the NFC in tackles.
• ·         Avril has 12+ sacks.
• ·         Stafford misses 3-4 games, but plays as a top 10 QB when healthy.
• ·         Hanson is unable to finish the season, and kicking becomes a huge weakness.

RECORD

The tough part about predicting the record is the uncertainty surrounding so many teams on the schedule. What do you do with Kansas City, who made the playoffs last year, but waaay overachieved? What about Chicago, who made the playoffs with Jay Cutler at QB?

I will go with 10-6. The wins?

·         At Tampa Bay

·         Kansas City

·         At Minnesota

·         Chicago

·         San Francisco

·         At Denver

·         Carolina

·         Minnesota

·         At Oakland

·         At Green Bay

I just peed a little. I am picking them for the playoffs, but losing in the first round unless the pull the winner of the NFC West, in which case they go 1-1 in the playoffs, and statues of Schwartz are erected outside Ford Field. Also, I just said erected.

Here goes nothin….

SEMS guide to weathering the Lockout

Despite the 24 hour extension that goes until 11:59 this evening, there is a good chance that the NFL will undergo a work stoppage. A recent poll, that I just made up, says that the average American spends 16 hours a day doing NFL related activities. With no on the field action, we need to find something to occupy our time. Luckily, we (I) here at SEMS have come up with a handy guide to help you get through the lockout.

Pogs-Pogs was a game from the mid 90's that involved little cardboard discs and heavier discs that you threw at a pile of the cardboard discs. I think. I had quite a few pogs back in the day. I had this sweet Chinese throwing star slammer made of brass. I don't think I actually played a "game" with them, but I had a nice little collection. With all this extra time, I may try to bring this game back.

Watching the entire Little House on the Prairie series on DVD- I was never a big fan of this show. I was never even a moderate fan of this show. My mom used to watch it regularly, and I remember the blonde girl was a huge bitch, and there was a blind and/or deaf girl. IMBD says it was on for fucking ever 10 years. That should be good enough to get you to the start of training camp (whenever that is).

Moving on...

Latch Hooking- Not to be confused with actual hooking, this is a fun way to replace your Vai Sikahema Fathead with beautiful floral pillows that you made. Can you rest your weary head on an October 22nd matchup between the Bills and Dolphins? I thinks not.

Watch a Tyler Perry movie-Any Tyler Perry movie.  I would recommend Madea ....

Couldn't force my fingers to finish googling another title.

Volunteer at a local soup kitchen-The easiest way to ween yourself of of the NFL. I mean, all the players and owners are going to need charity right? They can't possibly pay the insurance on their Bentleys, Maybachs, Bugattis, and Escalades and still have money left over for three meals a day, can they? I assume the owner's can sustain themselves on the concession stand inventory for a while, but pretzels and cotton candy only last so long. Just be careful when you serve Braylon Edwards. He will most likely drop the bowl.

Thursday NFL Quickies

The NFLPA and Owners have decided on a 24 hour extension on the current CBA. I still doubt a deal gets done any time soon, but at least there's hope.

The Lions have released Julian Peterson, which, hooray!!!

The Lions also failed to tender RB Kevin Smith, so RB becomes a priority since Jahvid Best seems to be made from the same ceramic material as Matt Stafford. If this means Mark Ingram at 13, color me pissed.

Former Lion WR Tommie Boyd was sentenced to 2-15 years for sexually assaulting a 14 year old girl. This came as he was a HS track coach. The optimist in me hopes this was a big misunderstanding, but I am far to jaded to believe it. What a shame.

Lions sign Erik Coleman

The Lions signed veteran safety Erik Coleman to a 1 year deal yesterday. Despite the impending labor situation, it's nice to see Detroit sign a potential starter. Coleman and Delmas would be a pretty good set of safeties. Now if only Patrick Peterson could land here. This could also lead to Spievey moving back to corner if need be.

Coleman was a fifth round draft pick out of Washington State in 2004. He spent 4 years with the Jets and the last two with Atlanta, so worst case, h
e brings a winning attitude. Best case, he turns into a Troy Ploamalu/Ed Reed hybrid and wins the NFL MVP award. I said best case, not most likely case.

Hold on to Your Hats

So the Lions made a major announcement yesterday. None of my predictions were accurate. They announced that the preseason games would be shown on ABC in 2011. Yawn. They really needed to hold a press conference to announce something that 8 people care about? This just in, the Lions are changing the ketchup at all food stands from Hunts to Heinz. All official Lions t-shirts will be switching from Fruit of the Loom to Hanes Beefy Ts.

So once again, the Lions make a big fuss over practically nothing. April 28th can't get here soon enough.

Lions to resign Matt Millen?

Trade Matthew Stafford for Mike Williams? Switch to the vaunted 1-2-8 defense? Who knows with this franchise. The Lions will be making a "Major Announcement" this evening at 7. My vote is to switch from Honolulu Blue and Silver to Neon Pink and Khaki. More to come if details leak....

Super Bowl Thoughts

It started off bad when I looked up and thought Snooki was going to be singing the National Anthem.

Turns out, Snooks might have been a better choice. I was unaware Aguilera was still relevant. I've heard the it's the hardest song to sing, and add to that the pressure of 100,000 people staring at you, and many people would forget the words to a song we learned when we were 7. It was just a bad choice. She was following the lips from Glee, and was competing with the awful Bud Light commercials. They should have gone with someone who doesn't have to keep repeating the words "Keep your legs closed. Keep your legs closed. Keep your legs closed." the way Christina does. She probably rushed through the song before she did anti-FCC things to the mic she was holding. As Brian from MGoBlog said on Twitter..."And now, to honor America, the whoriest whore we could find."

Unfortunately, it would prove to be the best musical performance of the evening. I will start by saying that I am not a Black Eyed Peas fan. I have never liked one song the "sing" and I think if Fergie, Lady Gaga,and I all got up to pee, we'd be shoulder to shoulder at a line of urinals. But even I had no idea how bad it could get. We quickly found out. It started off bad. Like bad, bad. Then when the music for "Sweet Child O Mine" started, I said to myself, I says "self, this is about to get better" only to be let down again. Fergie either got shot or stubbed her toe on the way to accost Slash. To call what that was singing is a slap in the face to Milli Vanilli's illustrious career. I.....wha.....yeah. Then Usher came out, danced around to backing vocals, did the splits, and get the fuck outta there before he caught whatever suck was lingering in the air. I would have rather watched a new episode of "Grey's Anatomy" featuring the cast of "Teen Mom" than watch a condensed version of any song performed during half-time.

The game was meh. Considering Pittsburgh had a chance to take the lead with less than a minute left, the whole game was boring. Take away the dropped passes and dumb penalties, and Green Bay wins by 4 TDs. The only interesting thing were the injuries. People were dropping like kids at an all you can eat sushi bar. I turned my phone on in case Ted Thompson called and asked me to play corner. The final score was 31-25, and, as you can see here, I predicted 31-27. 

Lastly, I really hated the Black Eyed Peas half-time show. I wasn't sure if I made that clear earlier. On to the Detroit Super Bowl, A.K.A. The NFL Draft.

SEMS Prop-Bets

Betting on the final score can be boring. We(me) here at SEMS are looking for some more interesting wagers. Wagers you may not find in a sports book in Vegas. Without further adieu....

Total number of Roethlisberger interceptions/rape accusations is set at 3. SEMS takes the over.

Total number of James Starks rushing yards + Brett Favre mentions is set at 1415. SEMS takes the over.

Total number of Clay Matthews sacks + Charles Woodson INTs + Troy Polamalu hair care commercials is set at 71. SEMS will take the under, but only because Roethlisberger will avoid Woodson.

Mentions of the Texas weather in regards to Green Bay/Pittsburgh is set at 12. SEMS will take the over.

Horrible halftime performances by the Black Eyed Peas is set at one. SEMS takes it at even money.

Number of anticlimactic GoDaddy.com ads where they insinuate nudity when you visit their website is set at 8. SEMS takes the over.

Lockout/Strike mentions+DeMaurice Smith cameos is set at 6. SEMS takes the under. Smith won't show his face.

So there you have it. Feel free to place your bets in the comment section. The commenter who wins biggest will get an autographed picture of the author. Or a shoutout on the blog, winner's choice.

Super Bowl Prediction Thread-(UPDATED)

There are roughly 27,322,969 sports journalists in America. This includes ESPN writers, bloggers, Facebook users, and the worst of the worst, newspaper guys. Every year, we all make our predictions on the outcome of the Super Bowl. Every year, 20,000,000 of us end up looking foolish. I would like to make my official entry into the brotherhood.

When Green Bay has the ball

This is the match up I am most looking forward to. Elite offense vs elite defense. Aaron Rodgers vs Troy Polamalu. Donald Driver, Greg Jennings, and James Jones vs Ike Taylor, Bryant McFadden, and Ryan Clark. The GB o-line vs LaMarr Woodley,James Harrison, and Beard Keisel. The only weakness is the Green Bay running game. James Starks is leading the NFL in postseason rushing, but I doubt he can do much damage against Pittsburgh's front seven. The question for Pittsburgh will be "Can they stop all 3 WRs?", and that answer will be no. Advantage-Push


When Pittsburgh has the ball


Another intriguing matchup. Green Bay has looked impressive in the postseason. Clay Matthews, Tramon Williams, and Charles Woodson have been on fire, and guys like B.J. Raji and Desmond Bishop have really stepped up. I really like Rashard Mendenhall, and they have nice pieces in Mike Wallace, Heath Miller, and Hines Ward. Central Michigan's Antonio Brown has been somewhat of a revelation as well, making big play after big play. Overall, I think Green Bay's playmakers will have their hands full with Ben Roethlisberger, who somehow always seems to make a play. Ultimately, I see Big Ben trying to do to much, and tossing a couple picks. Advantage-Packers


Special Teams


I honestly just realized that Shaun Suisham was the Steelers' kicker. What happened to my personal favorite kicker, Jeff Reed?

Did he return to the WWE as Scotty Too Hottie?

Punters won't factor much in this game, since neither team have a Devin Hester. Green Bay's kicker Mason Crosby is pretty good, and I had him on my fantasy team for a few weeks, so...Advantage-Packers

Local Flavor

The Steelers have 6 players who played their college ball in the state of Michigan:

• Charlie Batch
• Antonio Brown
• Flozell Adams
• Larry Foote
• LaMarr Woodley
• Ryan Mundy

The Packers have 7:

• Greg Jennings
• T.J. Lang
• Nick McDonald
• Cullen Jenkins
• Frank Zombo
• Josh Gordy
• Charles Woodson

Advantage-Packers

Lost to the Lions Factor

In week 14 the Packers lost to Detroit 7-3. I realize Aaron Rodgers was hurt, but a Super Bowl Champion should be able to beat the Lions, who started Drew Stanton, with their back up QB. The Steelers beat the Lions in week 4 of the preseason. Advantage-Steelers

Conclusion

I like the Steelers, honest I do. I just don't like the way they match up with Green Bay. Pittsburgh has tons of playoff experience (which may be a surprise to hear if you don't have ESPN) and a great defense. Green Bay argues about team photos, have an almost-elite offense, and a very good defense. If this were a regular season game, I would call for a GB blowout, but I think Pitt keeps it close.

Prediction

Green Bay-31

Pittsburgh-27

EDIT- I was in the shower, and I realized that Ryan Mundy is playing for Pittsburgh. He played the majority of his career at Michigan, before spending his 5th year at West Virginia. The count is still 7-6, so it doesn't  change the outcome. And to answer your question, yes I often think of under achieving former Michigan defensive backs at random times. Just the other day, I was in the middle of class, and I caught myself wondering "I wonder what Willis Barringer is up to?".

Hide Yo Kids, Hide Yo Wife

I had talked myself out of mentioning this when it first came out, since these cases are often times without merit, but it keeps coming to light, so here it is. A Lions player is being accused of improperly contacting a 22 year old at a holiday party at the Ironwood Grill in Plymouth. I will let you click the first link for the details, but this can't be good. There are a few members of the defense we can rule out, like Julian Peterson, since the young lady would have gotten by untouched like everyone else he tried to grab this season.

Let's hope this is just a misunderstanding, and no one was seriously hurt, and no one will find themselves in prison. Cuz if this is as bad as it sounds, We gon' find you. So you can run and tell that.....Homeboy.

Brett Favre Files Retirement Papers

ESPN is reporting that Brett Favre has shown his penis to Erin Andrews filed papers with the NFL announcing his retirement. He also filed the papers following the 2008 season, so I won't believe it until he's on Dancing With the Stars. Here's to hoping, though....

Was the 2010 NFL Draft the best ever?

I was perusing the results of the first round of the 2010 NFL Draft recently, and noticed something strange. A large amount of the teams that picked in the top ten improved dramatically this year. Here's a look at the top ten from last year, along with their 2009 record...

1. St. Louis (1-15)
2. Detroit (2-14)
3. Tampa Bay (3-13)
4. Washington (4-12)
5. Kansas City (4-12)
6. Seattle (5-11)
7. Cleveland (5-11)
8. Oakland (5-11)
9. Buffalo (6-10)
10. Jacksonville (7-9)

So taking a look at that list, here are their final 2010 records...

1. St. Louis (7-9) Missed playoffs by one game.
2. Detroit (6-10) Ended on 4 game winning streak, robbed in at least one game.
3. Tampa Bay (10-6) In playoff hunt until the very end.
4. Washington (6-10) Still a mess, but improved by 2 games.
5. Kansas City (10-6) Made playoffs.
6. Seattle (7-9) Improved by two games, and made playoffs.
7. Cleveland (5-11) Same record, but beat the Saints and Patriots.
8. Oakland (8-8) Went 6-0 in their division.
9. Buffalo (4-12) There had to an exception.
10. Jacksonville (8-8) One game improvement.

So those ten teams went from a combined 42-118 for a winning percentage of 26.25 percent, to 71-89, or 44.38 percent. The winner of the NFC West had a winning percentage of 43.75 percent. I'm not sayin, I'm just sayin...

So was it the players selected, or that long standing myth called "parity"? Of the top five candidates for the Pepsi Rookie of the Year, 3 were top ten selections. Here's a quick rundown of the top ten players selected...

1. Sam Bradford-Finalist for ROY, led Rams to near-playoff berth.
2. Ndamukong Suh-Voted as Pro Bowl starter, dominated at times.
3. Gerald McCoy-3 sacks in a solid year. Overshadowed by fellow rookies Blount and Williams.
4. Trent Williams-Started 13/14 games at Left Tackle.
5. Eric Berry-92 tackles,2 sacks, and 4 INTs.
6. Russell Okung-Played in 10 games. Suffered ankle injury.
7. Joe Haden-Tied for 3rd in NFL with 6 INTs.
8. Rolando McClain-Finished 5th in tackles by a rookie in 15 games started.
9. CJ Spiller-Disappointing year for the only team to finish with a worse record.
10. Tyson Alualu-Started all 16 games and finished with 3.5 sacks.

So once again, Buffalo is the only exception/disappointment. When you add in players from outside the top ten like Devin McCourty, Mike Williams, LaGarrette Blount, and the New England tight ends, and this was an amazing draft. If you can think of any drafts with a better immediate impact from the top 10, let me know.

A quick recap

There have been a few interesting tidbits the last few days, but nothing really worth its own post, so I will lump them all together here:

The Michigan coaching search is still a circus with Jim Harbaugh going to the 49ers. The latest rumors have them linked to Les Miles. He's batshit crazy, but has a better track record than Hoke, so I would be ok with that.

Speaking of Michigan, the first and certainly not last signs that the coaching situation is going to affect the long term success were announced on National TV yesterday at the Army All American Bowl. Three players, who were at one time thought to be Michigan leans committed elsewhere. Kris Frost, a WR/LB from NC committed to Auburn. FL S/OLB/Valedictorian Wayne Lyons declared for Stanford. Previously committed Army Player of the Year RB Dee Hart officially announced his intentions to go to Alabama. Rivals.com calls Michigan the "biggest loser" of the Army Bowl. Add to that the wavering commitments of other recruits, and, well, fuck....

On to brighter news. Lions Rookie of the Year candidate Ndamukong Suh (Vote for him here) will not be playing in the Pro Bowl due to a shoulder injury. It sucks, but I'd rather him be healthy for next season.

The Pistons are starting to get included in trade scenarios, citing their desire to shed salary. This one has Rip leaving, and Troy Murphy's expiring contract coming. I would jump on that. And if you think Detroit is giving up too much talent, add in Chris Wilcox or Jason Maxiell. ZING!!!

The Tigers are still being linked to Starting Pitchers. The most intriguing option I have heard is Brad Penny.
Verlander, Porcello, Scherzer,Penny, and Coke/Galarraga is a strong rotation. With Matt Garza going to the Cubs for a huge prospect package...umm....package of prospects, the trade market is looking expensive.

The Michigan Basketball team takes on the Semi-pro team, the Kansas Jayhawks today at 4:30 on CBS. I am receiving word that despite the recent transgressions, Kansas is still considered an NCAA team. My bad. They feature the Morris twins, Marcus and Markief, freshman guard, Josh Selby, who missed nine games for violating NCAA rules, and freshman guard Royce Woolridge. Woolridge is only averaging 3.9 minutes per game, but is the son of former NBA player and Detroit Piston, Orlando Woolridge. He was on the receiving end of a nasty posterization by Michael Jordan in 1990...



In non local news, what a crazy day in the NFL yesterday. I will sum it up with Marshawn Lynch's run...